The Anti-Glamour of Losing: Resisting Success and Embracing Failure

The reimagining of failure as a way to deconstruct the normative mode of thinking is both fascinating and uncomfortable. Halberstam’s perspective regarding failure as “standing outside of conventional understandings of success” is a unique way to present the queer (not solely in terms of homosexuality) identity. Queer Theory, as I understand it, is the antithesis of the normative mode of thinking and being in the world; however, Halberstam further pushes this thought by positing that failure be considered optimistically. By re-evaluating the characteristics of capitalistic notions of success, we are able to see failure as a means to an end.

My favorite part of this text is the section in Chapter 3 entitled The Art of Losing. I am particularly drawn to this because Halberstam juxtaposes the dignity of losing with the anti-glamour of losing. Indeed, we live in a country where children are admonished for being “sore losers;” yet, these same children are made to believe that anything but first place is unacceptable. In reading this section, I immediately remembered an episode of Lifetime TV’s “Dance Moms.” The girls (all 9-11 years of age), lost the first place trophy by 1/10 of a point. Just as Halberstam suggests about 4^th place, Abby Lee Miller (the founder of the dance studio) heatedly advises her team that it would have been better to be dead last. It is the rejection of being “almost good” or “almost a star” that makes the idea of failure appealing and queer.

Lastly, I am extremely drawn to the idea of hidden history. In chapter 5, Halberstam writes that “gay and lesbian scholars have also hidden history, unsavory histories, and have a tendency to select from historical archives only the narratives that please” (148). It is in the hidden history that we see the all-encompassing fear of failure. I feel the need, in this instance, to draw a parallel between the African American and Queer communities. It is also true, that the African American story, (I reluctantly admit this), hides history and presents both pleasing and expected narratives. We expect to hear about that white community’s role in chattel slavery just as we expect to hear about the Nazi’s staunch homophobia. Each of these communities, in my opinion, has earned the right to present a positive image; yet, Halberstam would argue that the beauty in the failure should not be ignored.

While I'm not exactly sold on all of the ideas that Halberstam presents, I must admit that there is value in embracing failure. In order to successfully do this, we must change our ideas of the things that failure represents. Halberstam does not suggest that we embrace addiction, joblessness, and unproductivity, but rather that we alter our opinions regarding failure and sieze some opportunities to fail as a way to abolish the hegemony.